oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
