There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
