She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
