My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
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Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
there is puke in my bra ... again
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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