i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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