I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I think weed is turning my hair brown
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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