I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
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I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
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my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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