Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
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At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
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