Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma