Who wears a wallet chain?!
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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