Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize