what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.