the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
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I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
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Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.