u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I just had sex on a roof
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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