Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize