Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Vodka?
Forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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