he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
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