dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
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This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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