Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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