Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
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