I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
