i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize