How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
