I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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