It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Randomize
