so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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