I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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