i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize