i think my tv is drunk
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
