My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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