yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
