R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
