Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
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What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
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There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...