when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
she peed on how many people?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
