this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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