went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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