just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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