the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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