All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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