when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
