My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
