Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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