And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize