he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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