we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
