I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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