We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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