Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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