why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize