I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I can't put those talents on a resume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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