I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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